Yes, they are - and in more ways than one!

 As I said yesterday, our troubles can be initiations - and in more ways than one. For me, not only are my physical challenges deeper initiations into trust, self-acceptance, and mystery ("Why the heck is this happening to me?"), I am recognizing I am being given the opportunity to let people help me. For years, I have been the helper, especially when I worked at the retirement community and the senior center. I can't begin to remember all the times I helped someone walk down a long hallway, fetched a food item during a meal so they wouldn't have to get up from their seat, and offered emotional/spiritual support when the person felt discouraged and sad.

Every time I helped someone, my heart grew. I was helping myself as much as I was helping them. Now it's my turn to accept help when I need it. Yesterday, I went to the meditation retreat/workshop at Ananda in Bothell and the help and support I received was heart-touching. (Yes, I am noticing how often the word heart is showing up here.)

The parking team made sure one of the close parking spaces was held for me by putting my name on it! When I needed a little bit of extra support walking down a sloping area, someone was there to lend me her arm. People opened heavy doors for me. And my good friend Martha was there for support when I walked to and from the Yoga Hall for lunch. And, of course, everyone was happy to see me since I hadn't been there in awhile, and they made me feel very welcome.

For those of us who have always been the helpers, this reversed role isn't easy to accept. For right now, I am recognizing I need help sometimes and allowing myself to graciously receive it. Not only am I letting myself grow in a different way, I am giving others the opportunities for service that I have enjoyed over the years. It is win-win.

Of course, I like to see this as a temporary situation and maybe it is. I am also learning how long this initiation lasts isn't up to me. One day, one hour, one moment at a time is what I focus on - another initiation, I guess, learning to let go of control and of time. Hmmm...the more I look at this, the more it's feeling like a quiz of some kind. Is someone asking me to show I know how to live the concepts I have written about and taught for the past 30 years? If so, I hope I am passing the test!