Most people assume that if you are female, you are a mother. Truth is, there are manny of us who never had human children for one reason or another. Some women couldn't have children even though they desperately wanted to do so and, for whatever reason, weren't able to adopt. Other women make a conscious decision not to have children.
No matter the reason, it's important for those of us who are not mothers to human children - and, yes that includes me - to realize that being a mother does not automatically make someone a better person. It is okay not to be a mother. And in some cases, the world is better served by our not being parents.
Not all mothers are saints. Not all mothers have adoring children. Some mothers are alienated from the children they loved and raised as best they could. I have known some mothers who would abort retroactively if that were possible.
Having said all of that, what's also true is we can embody the best qualities of motherhood just as men can. We can mother ourselves and lost souls who are alienated from their own mothers. We can mother fur-feather-fin-scale children who need us. We can mother situations, businesses, crafts, and homes. And, most important of all, we can be earth mothers to the planet.
So, whether or not you have human children, it really is okay to celebrate Mother's Day. If a total stranger says Happy Mother's Day to you today, instead of saying you're not a mother, just smile and say thank you!
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